Steven Gerrard vs John Terry: the affair, the pregnancy and the England captaincy, but what about THE TRUTH

After England’s shocking World Cup performance, it is no surprise that rumours as to why they were so bad have started.

It is being widely reported that there was a massive split in the England camp, with John Terry and his followers on one side and Steven Gerrard on the other. The story the press is telling you at the moment is that Terry thought Gerrard was a shocking captain, but is that the whole truth???

Whispers are going around Twitter suggesting that it is a far more sordid affair!

Allegedly Steven Gerrard had an affair and got her pregnant. Supposedly the reason this is not in the press is due to a gagging order in place for at least the next two weeks.

As you can imagine, if the rumour is true, John Terry is right to be upset as he was stripped from the captain position following his affair with former Chelsea teammate, Wayne Bridge’s fiancee!

Is there an England player who has not been caught with his pants around his ankles??

Looks like we should rule out Ashley Cole, Wayne Rooney, and Frank Lampard from becoming captain (and they are they ones we know about)!

At this rate, there will be no players left to choose from…

Apparently there are FIVE big stories that have been covered up about England’s performance; if this is one what are the other four???

John Terry’s father pleads guilty to dealing cocaine

Not a great week for John Terry, yesterday he hobbled away from his training ground with an injured metatarsal, and today his father, Edward Terry, 56, has pleaded guilty to supplying cocaine.

The 56-year old supplied drugs to an undercover reporter from the News of the World in a wine bar in November.

He was released on bail and will be sentenced at Basildon Crown Court on June 1st.

If sentenced to jail time, he won’t even be able to watch his son in the World Cup this Summer!

John Terry spirals out of control as Chelsea season goes from bad to worse

After Chelsea drew with Blackburn yesterday, John Terry’s family have not been able to contact him.

The pressure on the ex-England captain is mounting.

Since the news broke about his infidelities, Chelsea have slumped with 5 hammering losses and 2 draws.

This is the worst spell Chelsea have been through in several years.

The Terry family are worried that the Chelsea captain is getting more and more depressed.

Well John there is only one person to blame…

Whilst John Terry has quiet night with wife, Wayne Bridge has his way with more Miami Models

John Terry spent last night with his current wife (she was his wife when we went to print at 12.52) at the West End production of ‘Thriller’.

However will JT be rather jealous of ex-best mate, Wayne Bridge, who is in Miami galavanting with young girls and seemingly having much more fun than a Michael Jackson tribute show?

Wayne Bridge has been a hit with the Miami ladies. Swamped with girls throughout his holiday, we can easily guess where Wayne Bridge will be going instead of South Africa this summer!

Hope you’re having fun John.

The Marriage Ref: will it end in divorce?

Every so often you hear of a new TV show and you stop and think that is either going to be amazing, or so terrible it will get pulled after the first episode.

The Marriage Ref is one of those shows. The brainchild of usually funny man, Jerry Seinfeld who came up with the concept after having a public fight with his wife, Jessica.

The show involves real life couples who have been fighting for a long time putting their marriage problems to the Marriage Ref. The ref is aided in his decision by the celebrity panel who vote with either the husband or the wife, although the ref doesn’t have to pay any attention to the panel if he doesn’t want to. Which does make you question the point of having a panel?

The show has been mauled by the critics and the initial ratings have been shocking. However I am sure people will tune in to see Madonna attempt to give marriage advice. Although marriage advice from Madonna is a little like getting investment advice from Bernie Madoff!

Who will they get next? How about a panel of Tiger Woods, Ashley Cole and John Terry?

HILARIOUS VIDEO: I’m Just A Glamour Girl by Chenille Steele

We at Papture just love everything about this video!

Favourite lyrics must be:

‘I”ve been spit roasted in Grosvenor House, by the boys from Chelsea FC,

Max Clifford’s on my speed dial, in case I have John Terry’s baby.’

‘I’ve kissed and told on Ashley Cole, and I’ve got 20k from The Sun,

cause I’m just a glamour girl, who likes it up the bum’

Its amazingly rude, but also AMAZINGLY TRUE!

Wayne Bridge pulls out of England team and will not work with John Terry

Wayne Bridge has pulled out of the England team as he will not work with ex-best friend, John Terry.

Wayne Bridge has declared himself unavailable for England, saying his position is “untenable and divisive”

“I have thought long and hard about my position in the England football team in the light of the reporting and events over the last few weeks,” said Bridge in the statement. “It has always been an honour to play for England. However, after careful thought I believe my position in the squad is now untenable and potentially divisive.”

With Rio Ferdinand and Ashley Cole injured, has John Terry ruined England’s chances of winning the world cup?

Girls Alone

Cheryl Cole has arrived home to a half empty house due to Ashley moving out this afternoon.

Although we are unsure about where he went we are sure that being a Chelsea footballer he had a lot of advice about where to go from his captain, John Terry!

Cheryl’s plan to ditch Ashley on a Tuesday was the perfect move for the pop princess. She can now do the obligatory four nights at home with the ‘girls’. But come the weekend we expect her to hit the London Scene and show the world how much better she is now she is single.

We would prefer her partying at Nobu before stumbling out of M*vida wearing no underwear than staying married to a low-life like Ashley Cole.

Ashley, being a professional footballer, is expected to go out and score two goals in his next football match in an attempt to remind people that he is a pro footballer. But ‘unfortunately’ for him he is injured, so instead he will be sitting it out on the bench!

Cheryl Cole and Ashley Cole Officially Split

Cheryl Cole’s PR team have just announced that she is finally divorcing her scumbag husband, Ashley Cole and giving up her WAG status!

“Cheryl Cole is seperating from her husband Ashley Cole. Cheryl asks the media to respect her privacy during this difficult time.

We have no further comment to make.

Supersonic PR”

Good on you Cheryl. I can’t say I am surprised, it is about time.

Since Elin Woods announced that she will ‘stand by her man‘, Tiger, the Cole divorce could be the news story of 2010.

The legal sharks have already started circling as this promises to be a fabulous divorce battle. Although Cheryl is a millionaire in her own right she could still be entitled to a large chunk of Ashley’s larger, multi-million pound Chelsea pay packet.

John Terry is shaking in his boots as he fears that divorcing a footballer will be the new craze of 2010.

Life Lesson No.9, courtesy of Ashley Rascole

Trust me, I'm a Celebrity

So, you’ve been caught red handed, indictable and remiss. Again. The evidence is piled high against you and the people of the world (or the readers of The Sun, at least) are scorning you with violent castigation. What do you do? Hang your head in shame and beg for mercy, hoping all will look upon a pennant sinner with forgiving eyes and generous amnesty? Do you, heck! It seems instead that a new policy is being prescribed by every Spin-doctor in town, urging the errant Celeb-folk of today to follow a more belying course of action. And it’s time for us all to follow suit. Thus we turn our attention to a seasoned pro – a (football) player supreme who, inspired by the success of his wife Cheryl, has taken to finding out for himself who’s really got The XXX Factor. Yes, with sheepish wrongdoing and fingers-crossed, we look upon Ashley Cole to deliver our next celebrity life lesson: categorically and in no uncertain terms, Deny. It. All.

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